Thor

So I'm sound asleep when I hear my neighbors ankle biters doing their thing. I open one eye, seems like they're just barking to bark. Intruder alert: false. A deep breath and my eye starts to close. There is a weird fluttering sound followed by more barking. My thought is, when did a bird get into my bedroom? Time to figure this out, both eyes are open. I roll over and the fluttering is Thor shaking the curtains, which is followed by a minute of barking. I see...

My solution is to pin the curtains shut. Unfortunately I caught Thor in my pining. I almost lost it, Thor was pinned, spread eagle against my window. Thor didn't know what to do, which is fine, cause I did. I grabbed some dental floss and very loudly dropped my fire extinguisher behind Thor and tied everything together. I told Thor the fire extinguisher was aimed at his butt and if he moved he was going to get a Kiddie Enema! I went back to sleep.